it all started with a cracked nipple...

Ya! A flippin cracked nipple! How the heck does that happen after you've been breastfeeding for SEVEN months? Here's how it went down....

Last Thursday while breastfeeding: "That's weird. This hurts a little."

Friday: "Ya something's wrong. This hurts."

Saturday: "OWIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Saturday night: "Shoot me in the face. Now please." Called hospital pain was so bad. They said I needed to come to ER because I wouldn't be able to make it until Monday. I had a flippin yeast infection. Got drugs.

Tuesday: Better but drugs gone and pain coming back. Head to doctor. Mastitis. Well isn't that fan flippin tabulous?

Seriously, I would rather go through childbirth than go through that again.

I spent all day in bed yesterday with a fever, headache, sore throat, and aches so bad the tips of my fingers hurt. My poor kids watched TV for like 10 hours straight. Supermom I am not. I will be staying in bed when I feel like shit thank you very much.

I ran out of Juice Plus so didn't take it for a couple weeks and look what happens to me.

Feeling revived today. Even felt up to blogging which hasn't been a priority lately as you may have noticed. Now onto laundry. And possible a shower...

Linked at Blue Monkey Butt.

sleepless in sickville

So here I am, 3 in the morning and typing away. I've had a cough and congestion for about 2 weeks now. It mainly only flares up at night and it's been AWFUL! Normally I would take my trustworthy NyQuil and be on my merry way to a good night's sleep. Aren't the first months of pregnancy bad enough WITHOUT being sick? Not to mention you can't freakin take anything for it!

I'm a huge believer in Airborne. Swear by it. If I feel sickness coming on I start popping that every 3-4 hours. Did you know you're not even supposed to take that when you're pregnant? I work at a preschool and daycare, it's not like I can really avoid sick kids, who cough and sneeze in your face and practically wipe their noses on your sleeve.

Now in ADDITION to this crappiness, I'm feeling the morning sickness coming on! Unless it's more actual sickness creeping my way.

Let me give you the LD on me. I LOVE my sleep. I NEED my sleep. I SAVOR my sleep and precious weekend naps. SO PLEASE JUST LET ME SLEEP!!!!!!!!!!!!

P.S. The concerts were AWESOME! I recommend going if the roadshow's coming to your area. $10 GENERAL ADMISSION! Can't beat that!

P.P.S. Went to Joe's Crab Shack for the first time and ate an entire bucket of crab by myself. YUMMY! Word to the wise: Stick to Applebee's for birthdays and free dessert. Joe's makes you get up and do stuff. We had to stand on chairs in the middle of the restaurant and spell our names with our butts as everyone sang happy birthday. Did we get free dessert? No. Another person had to dig for a cherry (no hands of course) in a bowl of whipped cream in which a cherry did not exist. Great entertainment when you're not the butt of the joke. :)

the life of deductibles

We were blessed to be covered by medicaid while I was going through school. Thank the Lord for that! There was no way we would have been able to pay medical bills with everything Otter went through.

So, this is the first entire year we will have our own health insurance, and something tells me it's not going to be difficult to meet the deductible. The best part...our dental deductible is separate.

I miss medicaid. In just three months we have had...

• 4 wisdom teeth pulled (worse than childbirth)
• puking
• more puking
• RSV
• fever
• ear infection
• more puking
• diarrhea
• more puking
• 4 cavities filled
• rash
• sore throat
• fever
• strep
• 2 cavities filled, almost root canal
• chest retractions
• ER visit
• breathing treatments
• sore throat
• fever
• pink eye
• fever
• coughing
• breathing treatments
• NEGATIVE! influenza test
• puking

I hadn't been to the dentist in 6 years so needless to say they had some work to do. I have to get 3 more cavities filled next month. Do the math folks. That's 9 cavities in this pretty little mouth of mine. I brush everyday but I should really consider flossing. At least my smile looks healthy. :)

It's only March?

birth control minus vomiting...hopefully

If you're not new here you know that birth control and I are not friends. I talked to my doctor today to see what else she recommended. She prescribed NuvaRing, which is a ring you insert "up there." For some reason it kinda gives me the heebs, but we'll see. It probably would've been smart to wait a few weeks to make sure I'm not preggers before I bought it, but I didn't want to jinx it.

After baby #3 I'm definitely getting Mirena. The Doc tried to talk me into it after Raven but I decided against it, mostly because we couldn't afford it at the time.

Otter is now sick. He has an ear infection and a rechid sore throat. Poor kid. Because of the diet we're pretty limited on how we can treat things. Nothing that the sick bed can't take care of.

Have a great weekend!

what's worse than being down in the back?

Being down in the back AND being sick.

I've always had a sensitive back from a couple accidents when I was younger. 4 years ago I bent over to pick up a box and completely collapsed with a loud wail. HOLY (or not) MOTHER OF FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT! I was COMPLETELY out of commission. We're talking they brought a mattress to me and I peed in Otter's diapers. It was that bad.

So yesterday I lifted my kitchen aid mixer, (damn heavy, do they make them with wheels cuz I could make bookoo bucks on that one.) Nothing happened right then but within an hour I was completely hunched over and wailing in pain.

This morning not only did my back hurt like hell, but I'm sick to boot! What the? We're talking the sore throat, fever, chills, achy achy achiness shooting through the tips of my fingers and the rest of my body. WWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! I just want to cry. Like a baby. Whine and moan because that will make it feel better. No.

Went to the doc, prescribed anti-inflammatories, told me not to lift ANYTHING, including my daughter. Uh....do you have kids Mister PhD? How do I NOT lift my daughter when I'm the only one home with her 75% of the day. Yes, I can avoid it some, but I still have to put her in her crib, put her in her car seat, yatta yatta yatta. Give me a break! I can't just stop being a mom for awhile. If only it was that easy.

Otter's doing his best to take care of me.

Otter: I'm sorry you're not feeling well Mom.

Me: Thanks bud.

Otter: Would you like some apple juice?

Me: No thank you. (What a sweetheart.)

Otter: How about some water?

Me: Yes, water would be great. (What a gem.)

Otter: Well then go get some, and don't forget to drink a lot. It will help you feel better. (Off he goes.)

Not exactly how I saw that playing out, but at least he cares.

my pathetic realization and the mommyness of mommyhood

HOLY MOLY! If you've been missing me it's because my internet has been down for two days. I was so livid. 2 ENTIRE DAYS? SERIOUSLY? Apparently a fiber had been cut or something. I DON'T CARE WHAT'S WRONG, JUST FIX MY FLIPPIN INTERNET!

This dilemma caused me to come to a pathetic realization... I spend WAY too much time on here. I had no idea what to do with myself. I'd try the internet, and just sit there, wondering what in the world to do with my time. Gee, maybe I could file those papers over there from 2007. Nah. Try the internet again. Maybe I could start painting the bathroom. Nah. Try the internet again. Maybe I could sort through the kids' clothes that are too small. Nah. Try the internet again. There are so many little projects that need done and I couldn't make myself do ONE of them. This has proven to be a TRUE excuse for procrastination, more so than I ever realized.

I was finally looking forward to a good night's sleep last night since Raven and I were feeling better. The moment I laid down, (it's ALWAYS THAT moment) Otter started crying complaining that his mouth hurt (aka throat.) I gave him a drink of water and told him sleep would make him feel better, but I knew damn well he was getting the same shit I had, and sleep is along the lines of impossible. He did do a great job of TRYING to sleep, but the whining and moaning continued. I made him a bed on the floor in my room. How would you like to watch a movie? Yes. That will be perfect. I'll turn on the movie, he'll watch, I'll sleep. Yes. I snuggle up in my warm cozy bed, and what else would happen but... Raven starts screaming. I go into her room and try EVERYTHING! Pacifier. Blanky. Bottle. Holding. Rocking. Walking. Nothing!

At this moment, feeling so tired it hurts, it seems difficult to remember exactly WHY I always dreamt of being a mother, because THIS REALLY SUCKS. And then I think to myself, there are women who dream of doing exactly what I'm doing right now. Sleep deprivation. Screaming. Whining. Husband in bed sleeping pretending he doesn't hear any of it. MISERY. They want that. They can't have it. I have it. But I also have moments of sheer amazingness. I look at my kids and think, wow, those are MY kids, they came from me, they're mine. Isn't it so amazing? What miracles God has created.

So I hold my crying daughter. I can sleep later. I decide to give this magical teething lotion that my doctor prescribed a try (it really is magical.) It worked. Good night my angel. I get back into bed knowing I'm truly fooling myself because Otter will be up the entire night. Wouldn't ya know, he slept peacefully until morning. Miracles.

And this moment right now. I've put the kids to bed. Otter is now crying because his mouth hurts again. Hubby is yelling at me to come upstairs and help him out. That poor man. I bet he has his hand full. ;) So I will go upstairs, and be the hero that is never the hero but only the mom. But being only Mom is more than I could ever dream of. Nighty-Night.

the sick bed...a love-hate relationship

I just spent the last two days in my sick bed. At first I thought I was barfing because of the pill, but then I found out I was barfing because I was pregnant...HAHAHA JUST KIDDING!!!!! Turns out I had the crud, and unfortunately so did Raven. What's really unfortunate is that you can't explain to a 1-yr-old why it's necessary to THROW UP IN THE BUCKET!!!!!

Anyhoo, I'm here to tell you about my sick bed. I don't know about you, but there's something that bothers me about being in my own bed when I'm sick, like I'm infesting it forever or something. So I lay our futon into a bed with fresh sheets and blankets in front of the TV. Awwww. I hate being sick, and therefore hate having to use the sick bed, but boy do I love my sick bed. Raven's first vacation on the sick bed proved to be a great one. She likes it as much as I do and I loved being able to cuddle the day away. The best part of my kids being sick is the cuddling, it's almost worth taking care of a sick one, (unless it consists of continually cleaning up puke.)

So today I washed up all the pukey and infested blankets and sheets, used half a bottle of anti-bacterial spray, and wala, good as new.

The peculiar thing... I HATE the sick bed when it's not a sick bed. The flippin mattress is always half on, half off, whole off, it drives me crazy. If it wasn't my favorite sick bed I'd toss the damn thing.

ya, better get to the basement

So last night was a semi-eventful night. I've been feeling like SHIT because I just started taking the pill. We've been using natural family planning but it was getting a little too risky for me. According to Femta, a natural planning program, I have 12 peak days to get pregnant, while most women only have around 3. No wonder we've had 2 surprises. Anyhoo, I was on the patch before Raven and every time I started a new cycle, I'd be sick the next morning, like morning sickness sick. It sucked.

So, back to the story... I was feeling like shit last night. A tornado warning is announced over my husband's pager, but I'm not worried because we're pretty much in them 30% of the time around here. I call Hubby, who is with the storm chaser, surprise surprise, to ask if we need to actually take cover, meaning crouch in a corner and put a mattress over our heads. No. The tornado siren starts blowing, I call him again, NOW do we need to take cover? "No, but ya better start headin to the basement." Are you flippin serious? The tornado siren is blowing, do you actually think I haven't even taken my kids to the basement??? What kind of mother do you think I am?

So, we're sitting in the basement, going about our usual business. And then...the siren...and then...the electricity. Shit. No flashlight. I go upstairs to stock up on candles. Now keep in mind I'm still feeling like shit. Otter's freaking out because he can't get the TV to work. I light all our candles downstairs and Hubby finally walks in the door, siren still sounding. He tells Otter to come "check it out" and then says, "Wait, you should probably stay away from the door." The glass door. Gee, ya think? Otter proceeds to check every light in the house, despite the fact we've told him the electricity is out and none of the lights work. "Well I'll just check this one. Hmmm, this one doesn't work either." No Otter, none of the lights will work until the electricity comes back on. "I bet this one will work. Hmmm, this light needs a new light bulb"...and on and on and on. Hubby leaves again. Meanwhile, our 6 fragrant candles all burning in one place is tending to make me a little nauseous. I lay down and let my small children play in the dark. Yes, mother of the year. To top it all off, I left a brand new package of diapers at work and didn't have ANY, and there was no getting outside. Thankfully that night my mom brought me a few after the storms cleared. What would I do without my mommy?

Anyhoo, the siren went off 8 times!!! It pretty much blew non-stop. It was raining pretty hard but nothing too serious. Hubby said he saw the tornado about 6 miles southwest of us, thankfully never making it's way over to us. It took a friend's garage and threw it against the side of their house. This is the hail that a friend had about 40 miles east. Needless to say a lot of damage was done.

So today, I still feel like shit and I'm even vomiting. I've done about 3 loads of laundry since we got back from Baltimore. Add it up, I don't want to.

Why does birth control suck? Is it like this for everyone or am I the odd ball? Please recommend something. Maybe I should just quit having sex all together. I bet that would strengthen my already rocky marriage...