get it on the computer

Otter's 7th birthday is coming up and he's all into Kung Zhu pets. I informed my mom what he wanted and this is the conversation she had with Otter over the phone.

Mom: Otter, I have a question for you and wondered if I might ask your opinion.

Otter: Sure, Grandma. What’s up?

Mom: Well I’ve been looking at some Zhu pets and I really don’t know what they’re about.

Otter: Oh Grandma, they’re awesome!

Mom: Well I’ve been thinking about how you don’t pick up your toys and how things get lost so fast and how they get broken. Sometimes when you say you really want something, you really don’t care about it when you get it.

Otter: Oh Grandma, you will not believe how responsible I would be. I would build a container at After School Club to keep them in. It would never be a problem. Oh Grandma, I really want the Special Forces . . . . . {and on and on and on} Do you have your computer handy?

Mom: I saw something about a hamster set? Is that what you want?

Otter: Awesome! They’re like little mice. Oh yeah, hamsters. That’s it. And . . . and . . . and . . .something about Ninja . . . and . . . {His description went on and on with intense enthusiasm.}

Otter: And there’s a thing like a house.

Mom: An arena?

Otter: That’s exactly it. How did you know? Did you see it on the computer or in real life? I know that where you live is a long way to drive to Sidney?

Me: Sidney? What’s in Sidney?

Otter: Well that’s where my friend, Gabby, got hers. She thought they were about gone. So I better hang up so you can go to Sidney. Bye. I love you.

Mom: Wait, Otter. I’m not going to Sidney. But I’ll be thinking about whether this is something you’ll take care of.

Otter: Absolutely, Grandma. You can count on me.

Mom: Have a good day at school. Bye. I love you.

Otter: Bye.

Ring . . . .

Mom: Hello.

Otter: Grandma, you hung up before I could tell you something. I think there’s a way that you can get them on the computer. I think it takes money though. I don’t know for sure how it works but somehow you can put money in the computer. Do you want me to ask my mom?


Hahahahahaah! My mom sent me this by email because she thought it was so hilarious. I have to admit I was laughing myself. The last part is my favorite!

I know I'm overdue for a People in Review. It's coming soon!

interview with otter

1. What is something mom always says to you?

Can you grab those papers out of the copy machine?
Just had him do that, it would consist of me having to take my laptop off my lap and I prefer not to do that.

2. What makes mom happy?

That I give you a card that says I love you in my heart.

3. What makes mom sad?

That Daddy yells at you.
Hubby's a cleanie, I'm a messie. Therefore yelling takes place occasionally, and I always end up bawling.

4. How does your mom make you laugh?

That you tickle me.

5. What was your mom like as a child?

Uh...I'm thinking. This is a hard one.

6. How old is your mom?

You're 80 91.

7. How tall is your mom?

100 feet tall

8. What is her favorite thing to do?

work
um...no

9. What does your mom do when you're not around?

pray for me

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?

You would be famous of loving me.

11. What is your mom really good at?

You're really good at playing games.

12. What is your mom not very good at?

You're not very good on the Wii. [laugh] What? You always die on Remorio (Super Mario Bros.)

13. What does your mom do for a job?

Work at the daycare...I mean, teaching the little kids.

14.What is your mom's favorite food?

noodles

15.What makes you proud of your mom?

That you say um, Where's [Otter's] shoes and you say they're in the laundry room. That makes me proud of you.
I'm taking that to mean I always know where his shoes are?

16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?

Oswald
an octopus...probably because I'm so good at multi-tasking...yeah right

17. What do you and your mom do together?

we play

18. How are you and your mom the same?

That we love each other.

19. How are you and your mom different?

That's because [Raven's] like you and I'm like my dad. I don't look like you because I don't wear glasses.

20. How do you know your mom loves you?

That you're proud of me.

21. What does mom like best about dad?

[Silence] Your dad or my dad? your dad [Silence] Um...I don't really know what to say about that.
How depressing is this? Maybe Hubby and I need to work on our PDA in front of the kids. However, I don't even really know how I would answer this.

22. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?

Subway, Pizza Hut
the ONLY places to eat in our town, besides a local restaurant and a NASTY gas station Taco John's that I will NEVER eat at again

what's worse than being down in the back?

Being down in the back AND being sick.

I've always had a sensitive back from a couple accidents when I was younger. 4 years ago I bent over to pick up a box and completely collapsed with a loud wail. HOLY (or not) MOTHER OF FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT! I was COMPLETELY out of commission. We're talking they brought a mattress to me and I peed in Otter's diapers. It was that bad.

So yesterday I lifted my kitchen aid mixer, (damn heavy, do they make them with wheels cuz I could make bookoo bucks on that one.) Nothing happened right then but within an hour I was completely hunched over and wailing in pain.

This morning not only did my back hurt like hell, but I'm sick to boot! What the? We're talking the sore throat, fever, chills, achy achy achiness shooting through the tips of my fingers and the rest of my body. WWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! I just want to cry. Like a baby. Whine and moan because that will make it feel better. No.

Went to the doc, prescribed anti-inflammatories, told me not to lift ANYTHING, including my daughter. Uh....do you have kids Mister PhD? How do I NOT lift my daughter when I'm the only one home with her 75% of the day. Yes, I can avoid it some, but I still have to put her in her crib, put her in her car seat, yatta yatta yatta. Give me a break! I can't just stop being a mom for awhile. If only it was that easy.

Otter's doing his best to take care of me.

Otter: I'm sorry you're not feeling well Mom.

Me: Thanks bud.

Otter: Would you like some apple juice?

Me: No thank you. (What a sweetheart.)

Otter: How about some water?

Me: Yes, water would be great. (What a gem.)

Otter: Well then go get some, and don't forget to drink a lot. It will help you feel better. (Off he goes.)

Not exactly how I saw that playing out, but at least he cares.

exhaustion setting in

One word. Adrenaline.

On Saturday morning Hubby left for what would be 4 days for work training at the other end of the state. I, being the person who can't say no, agreed to keep a friend's two kids for the weekend, ages 3 and 5. Holy moly, having 4 kids under the age of 5 is a lot of work. It went as well as it could have, but ugh.

So anyhoo, the kids and I have been so busy since then that we barely had time to notice that Hubby was gone. A friend stopped by today and asked Otter if his dad was coming home today. Get what he said... "No, he moved out." My friend kinda freaked since we had been having problems. But what in the world would make him say that? Kinda funny but kinda not.

The end. I'm so tired I can barely think.

tell me what you really think

I was browsing clearance sections in some online stores and Otter was telling me what he liked, most of which he liked and I didn't, or I liked and he didn't. So tell me, what's the point of buying something for him that I like when he doesn't? It's a constant battle to get him to wear it so I might as well buy the things he likes, even if I think they're appalling. Lesson learned...uh...yeah right.

I was looking at some things for myself and I found a cute dress (or so I thought) and asked Otter what he thought.

"Um...I think that's maybe ugly. Maybe you should buy a different one."

Who would have thought I'd be getting fashion advice from a 4-yr-old boy? Oh the lovely life of mommyhood.

ya, better get to the basement

So last night was a semi-eventful night. I've been feeling like SHIT because I just started taking the pill. We've been using natural family planning but it was getting a little too risky for me. According to Femta, a natural planning program, I have 12 peak days to get pregnant, while most women only have around 3. No wonder we've had 2 surprises. Anyhoo, I was on the patch before Raven and every time I started a new cycle, I'd be sick the next morning, like morning sickness sick. It sucked.

So, back to the story... I was feeling like shit last night. A tornado warning is announced over my husband's pager, but I'm not worried because we're pretty much in them 30% of the time around here. I call Hubby, who is with the storm chaser, surprise surprise, to ask if we need to actually take cover, meaning crouch in a corner and put a mattress over our heads. No. The tornado siren starts blowing, I call him again, NOW do we need to take cover? "No, but ya better start headin to the basement." Are you flippin serious? The tornado siren is blowing, do you actually think I haven't even taken my kids to the basement??? What kind of mother do you think I am?

So, we're sitting in the basement, going about our usual business. And then...the siren...and then...the electricity. Shit. No flashlight. I go upstairs to stock up on candles. Now keep in mind I'm still feeling like shit. Otter's freaking out because he can't get the TV to work. I light all our candles downstairs and Hubby finally walks in the door, siren still sounding. He tells Otter to come "check it out" and then says, "Wait, you should probably stay away from the door." The glass door. Gee, ya think? Otter proceeds to check every light in the house, despite the fact we've told him the electricity is out and none of the lights work. "Well I'll just check this one. Hmmm, this one doesn't work either." No Otter, none of the lights will work until the electricity comes back on. "I bet this one will work. Hmmm, this light needs a new light bulb"...and on and on and on. Hubby leaves again. Meanwhile, our 6 fragrant candles all burning in one place is tending to make me a little nauseous. I lay down and let my small children play in the dark. Yes, mother of the year. To top it all off, I left a brand new package of diapers at work and didn't have ANY, and there was no getting outside. Thankfully that night my mom brought me a few after the storms cleared. What would I do without my mommy?

Anyhoo, the siren went off 8 times!!! It pretty much blew non-stop. It was raining pretty hard but nothing too serious. Hubby said he saw the tornado about 6 miles southwest of us, thankfully never making it's way over to us. It took a friend's garage and threw it against the side of their house. This is the hail that a friend had about 40 miles east. Needless to say a lot of damage was done.

So today, I still feel like shit and I'm even vomiting. I've done about 3 loads of laundry since we got back from Baltimore. Add it up, I don't want to.

Why does birth control suck? Is it like this for everyone or am I the odd ball? Please recommend something. Maybe I should just quit having sex all together. I bet that would strengthen my already rocky marriage...